Haunted Trailer Park by Bankrupts

Halloween Camp
Final Round: 1  

I have a weak spot for campy songs, and this is like the bookend for White Trash Christmas, which is stylewise completely different than this one. It is a fantasy to have a song in the holiday rotation every year, and I am not saying I have it- these songs are so lo-fi and solo created- but I think I have good ideas and have produced a close approximation of the song idea. And a good song idea can always be improved.

I could call it pop because it is really. Of course it isn't super polished, but it is comedy, so maybe that gives me some leeway, but anyway I will go with alt.

Featured Review

It only took that first mention of ‘trailer’ to induce in my overactive imagination the following scene: a gathering of colourful characters are squeezed into the trailer, periodically contributing to what we then hear. There’s Junior twiddling on his acoustic guitar, payin’ no mind to nobody nor nothin’.
There’s the weird old frizzy-haired hippy lady from next door who pops her head round the door and goes, “Ooooh” every few minutes. Pa, a Roy Orbison lookalike is banging out a regular rhythm on a cheap keyboard balanced on his lap and his demented twin cousins take it in turns to croon, rave and become frighteningly animated. One of them has a crooked eye and a malevolent laugh. Just when it starts getting out of hand, Gramma stands up and everyone stops, looks at her in awe and waits until she sits back down before beginning all over again.
For the artist the advantage of this presentation is that a reviewer has to listen to it more than once in order to grasp the intention and direction of the piece. For the reviewer it’s easy to be disappointed by the promise of a word. For example, for ‘haunted’, one might expect something haunting. What you get is bizarre and freakish, and there’s a subtle difference. On the other hand, the piece is not wanting to please and is therefore indifferent.
But one can’t help but wonder whether anything doing some haunting in the trailer park would be able to get any attention with all this hullabaloo going on.
This tune has more of an atmosphere than a form. It’s annoying but sort of mildly endearing, and that’s because ol’ Pa is sometimes soothing and not always mean.



Haunted Trailer Park Music & Lyrics by Steve Bancroft

Verse 1:
she never did like living in that trailer
something about it never felt quite right
it had cold spots, it had hot spots, no good reason
and you'd hear footsteps down the hallway late at night
well sometimes the washer would start overflowing
sometimes the dryer it just wouldn't dry
and lately you would feel like someone's watching you
and you'd catch it in the corner of your eye

Chorus 1:
so don't go out after dark
in the haunted trailer park
even if you’re running out of chew
cuz if you go out after dark
in the haunted trailer park
well it’s a very very foolish thing to do

that’s it honey, that’s it
we’ll have to call them guys, you know, TAAPS
Trailer And Apartment Paranormal Society

you can call us anytime we'll come investigate
we'll set up our equipment and stay up very late
put night vision in the bedroom, put a camera in the kitchen
put a mic on top of something too embarrassing to mention
leave a six pack in the refrigerator
(we'll see if it is still there later)
is a thirsty ghost the perpetrator?
and if we're lucky we'll hit pay dirt

Verse 2:
he usually ends up sleeping on the sofa
he feels much safer being near the front door
and though he swears he left it by his pillow
his Grizzly ends up on the bedroom floor
that's where a deadly crime once was committed
a gruesome case of double homicide
and though the owner claims he changed the carpet
the smell of blood at night can't be denied

Chorus 2:
so don't go out after dark
in the haunted trailer park
even if you run out of chew
cuz going out after dark
in the haunted trailer park
would be a very inadvisable
a very very unreliable
a very very foolish thing
a very very ghoulish thing
yes a very very scary thing to do