Beasts, bells and tangles

[Krispy]

Here's a story of one tune and two songs.

Back in Dec 2004 my co-writer in Sugarstick sent me this tune, was pretty creepy with a fair bit of dissonance in it, so needed some consideration re subject matter. We agreed it should be dark.
I'd recently watched this documentary about a convicted paedophile who was back out in the community and how this large team of people (police, social workers, psychiatrist etc) had to work to keep him from re-offending. It was tough going and this guy sorta made your skin crawl but like many abusers, he was himself a victim, and his 'friends' were abusers so he was caught in this ghastly cycle.
I had this conflict thing going on because I had young kids and I wanted to condemn and be disgusted but at the same time it was fascinating because I could really see inside this bloke's head and sympathise with his struggles.
So anyway, this song which I originally called "Beasts", and later changed to "Bells" came out of that.

Here's a section of it:

Bells_proc_edit.mp3

(6.84 MiB) Downloaded 268 times

Lyrics:

Did I lose my self-control
On your floor
Coiled
If you see something that crawls
You could crush
If you wanted to

It’s how they made me
And you can’t save me

But my friends give me the love
That I knew
Before I grew
And they can’t save me

And what we call affection
Would really hurt you
I know they’re gonna get me but
Bells are ringing in my Hell.

Do I dare go out the door
Bread and milk
Playground
Dig my nails into my palms
Cos they told me
NO.

A home-grown loser
A true self-abuser

And what we call affection
Would really hurt you
I know they’re gonna get me but
Bells are ringing in my Hell.


After we recorded it and listened back we decided that the melody and song arrangment didn't really do justice to the ideas in the bed track so I agreed to trash it and write another song. Here we are discussing it:

opinions1.jpg (78.7 KiB) Viewed 4428 times

Jules had been uncomfortable with the subject matter, but still wanted something nasty, so I came up with this 'jealous vengeful lover' scenario and we chopped lots out and added other things and finally got this song which some of you will recognise as Tangled Up.

TU Mstr.mp3

(8.59 MiB) Downloaded 324 times

This is mastered to the max so adjust your gain.

Eyes scrutinize what is happening
Comfortable clothes are unravelling
Days I wove with you
Tangled up with talking to

Bitterness now my old sweet briar
Tangled up with razor wire

Oh I got to feel that I’m sinking
And overrun by you

Can’t name the thing I will never do
Nothing for me but all over you
Scratch my name on there
Tangled up with red rope hair

Oh I got to feel that I’m sinking
And overrun by you

God I’m sinking...


Tangled Up delivered perhaps the highest writing praise I've ever had, when a Garageband reviewer wrote "The lyrics are thoughtful and serious. The first verse in particular has a very intense subconscious communication".

[steban]

The stereo is rockin' in these two versions. Very rave, Kim. Not that I've ever been to a rave.

I think the dark lyrics were well served kept vague. They conveyed the idea of badness without the graphic blood and guts. Left to one's imagination, it can be pretty disconcerting.

I will say I enjoyed both, two different songs now. I thought the bells line in the first to be a novel image.

[Krispy]

Thanks Stebs, I was beginning to feel quite lonely in here.

[shankarji]

Interesting contrast kim...personally I prefer the original version, simply because I love that darkly whispered delivery. And I'm kinda surprised that Jules was averse to it because of the subject matter, because from the lyrics it's not that obvious what it's about. I also found the melodic side of the second version didn't seem to quite gel with the music quite as well as the first version.

[Krispy]

[Peevette]

I'm in agreement with Shankji, I prefer the first version, even though the lyrics are well done in "Tangled Up".

It really is interesting to see how a tune can change through the artist's process.